bear of time

there's 3 gays guys in Balboa Park.

an old white guy who has

white hair; they call him

Polar Bear

one big guy they call

Bear

then there's one new guy they call

Cub

go to Balboa Park at 8:30,

flash your headlights 3 times

or wave your sell phone and

it's

"OK"

these woman

and those paper-thin lips and

heart-wrenching smiles.

it's when they smile that

they steal your soul

away from you.

it's when it's gone

that you know you're

in a worst

position than

before.

and then your heart aches.

you convince yourself she wasn't

anything special.

she was a body with a soul.

maybe it wasn't her soul

but her body that you

wanted.

but her soul was lousy,

yes,

very lousy.

and like a drug and it's

addictions

you fucked around and

burned

an idiot red.

did you really think you could win?

you think,

as you pace the good earth.

maybe this time,

It's always,

maybe this time.

and

then the anger sets in...

How could she!

but as such things go,

your soul

suddenly

subsides and is

finally

set out to dry...

you're going to make yourself better,

you say.

you're committed.

you'll never get fooled again.

not you.

you've learned your lesson,

yet

nobody is in a greater hell

than you.

why, why, why,

you say.

those paper-thin lips are a

chance for somebody else now.

the smiles in their pictures

are here to stay.

as the devil smiles

blue birds sit upon the

fountain.

maybe there is hope to remember

technical support this is Ivan I can help you.

Ivan?

What's that? What's your name again?

Ivan?

Oh...

you remind me so much of this boy I dated many many

years ago in high school.

He was a Catholic boy but his parents wouldn't let us date.

Oh...

you've reminded me of so many wondrous

and delicious memories

Ivan, thank you

now I will have him on my mind.